Money is not a Four-Letter Word
Mase and Puff Daddy, back in the late 90s, created the song "Mo Money, Mo Problems.”
There are a lot of things I disagree with when it comes to Sean P. Diddy Combs, but let's start with the area relevant to you: There is no problem with more money.
Money is not a four-letter word. But you may have an awkward relationship with money.
You don't want to talk about money.
You don't want to ask for more money.
You don't want to want more money.
You think money is dirty and promotes greed.
You think money is hard to get--like Ryan Reynolds-- so what's the point?!
You are judge-y towards the people that do have money.
You may know how to make money, but you don't treat it in a way that you can keep it.
It's not your fault. In school you learned how to dissect a frog instead of how to dissect your relationship with a major resource- LIKE MONEY! And so when ish hits the fan, you are not ret to go with dealing with dough, bro!
It's typically not until we need to deal with money, that we choose to deal with money. Something unplanned happens and you don't have the money available to handle the disaster.
You find out how much someone else makes (because they report to you or tell you) and you do more/have more seniority/ are his/her/their boss. You do the math and you divide how much you work by your salary and find you are making less than minimum wage. Your life changes (maybe you have a baby, lose your job, or get a divorce) and suddenly, you need to start taking your time, your generational wealth goals, and your time/value equation more seriously.
All of the things above happened to me over a period of 10 years. And what helped me go from avoiding money, under-earning and over-working to working less and making more are as follows:
Reframing money as a resource not a ruler.
I was raised by hard-working parents. My dad is first-generation Italian and my grandfather never spoke English, did not drive and was a gardener for wealthy people who told him to put his shirt on when he'd strip down to his beater on hot days to trim their roses. I definitely didn't arrive with a trust-fund and my dad would always remind me that money didn't grow on trees. He'd refer to wealthier people in the town over as yuppies and even though my brother and I went to private school, we were always made aware that this was an investment in us and it did not come easily.
While my father has taught me a ton about how to save, avoid debt and how to work hard, his views and treatment of money created a halo effect of my being intimidated by money or thinking that it was inaccessible to me.
What helped me get over this was re-framing money not as a ruler but as a resource.I started thinking about money as water. It was here whenever I needed it, there were always ways to get more of it (loans, selling goods, services) and it was a tool to help me grow, provide eventually for my family, and help others who needed it. This helped me stop being afraid of money and being intimidated of wealth. I also read a lot about people who came from nothing and created immense wealth with their ideas and their efforts-- not with luck or an inheritance. This helped me believe in the possibility of wealth.
Know your numbers.
What you resist persists- so don't avoid your money like it's your ex. Look money in the eyes and then tell it what it needs to do for you.
Know your numbers in and out. Know where you want to and need to be to promote financial health and well-being (not just retirement, but if something happens tomorrow, how much cash do you need to feel "safe" for 3-6 months).
Also know your:
Credit score
Annual income pre and post taxes
Annual expenses and where your money goes
What you have in savings (retirement, cash-based savings, stocks, etc.)
What you have in debt
Value of any assets you have
These numbers will help you understand your net worth and then you can determine where you are and where you need to be to have a life where money works for you vs. you working for money.
Know how much you get paid per hour, even if you are salaried.
This helps you understand not only your true "rate" but the efficiency of your time spent working to the money you make. Determine the total number of hours worked by multiplying the hours per week by the number of weeks in a year (52). Next, divide this number from the annual salary (also include bonuses). For example, if you have a salary of $50,000 and works 40 hours per week, the hourly rate is $50,000/2,080 (40 x 52) = $24.04.
Determine how that sits with you and your financial well-being.
Money exchanges comes down to perceived value.
Whether you work for yourself, or work for a company, you are working in a value exchange with some customer. It's like trading! You trade your brilliance (in whatever form you have) for money from the customer (be it an employer, client, etc.)- And you are paid for your perceived value by the buyer.
So if you are underpaid and overworked, that doesn't mean that you as a human are not valuable (you are not a car or a purse, damnit!). That's a crock of poop. Your value is not negotiable. However, what you are paid for depends on what your customer deems is valuable based on their needs, and how much they are willing to pay for to have their needs met.
Their "price" threshold may depend on market factors and economic factors, or HR salary tracking studies that are sometimes accurate but often not--- regardless, most individuals price threshold is largely a subjective call based on some data.
That is actually good news! Because making money is about you creating value that your employer, boss, customer, or client loves. So to make more money, you need to align your offerings (talent, skills, capabilities) and your outputs (form of work) with what whoever is paying you is willing to pay for, and values so much, that they will pay you what you need and want to thrive.
Money is not a four-letter word.
Be unapologetic with wanting more of it, because you will likely do great things with it -like create independence for yourself, advance causes, and help others who need it. This is a form of power- a good form.
Go forth and prosper.
